Not long ago, there appeared an ad in a popular online classified site from a person in need of a considerable amount of typing and bookkeeping. The person who had placed the ad described herself as a “life coach” and was looking to barter. For the not small quantity of work that she needed done, she was willing to “coach” a respondent for an hour a week. A couple of ads later, some wag placed an ad of his or her own asking how a person so broke that she couldn’t pay cash for tasks, could possibly be giving advice to others.

The wit got right to the heart of the matter, that and how much did the life coach think her counsel was worth. An hour a week of gab for a gob of labor didn’t seem like such a great deal for the typist. Whose ability is of more value, the one who can actually do something concrete and practical or the life coach who can’t pay her bills?

It seems there a lot of people out there creating pseudo jobs for themselves. What exactly is a life coach and where do they get their training? Are there actually those who need life coaches? Or have life coaches, like the authors of the oxymoronic self-help books, videos and retreats, convinced some among us that there is a way to live that can be taught in an hour a week or by reading a formulaic book or by secluding yourself with a bunch of other needy people and a few really positive ones?

What did the people of previous generations do so that we as a species could arrive in the 21st century? Did Will Shakespeare have a life coach? He seemed to know a lot about life, more I’d wager than anyone calling themselves a life coach. What about Falstaff? He was a drunk and layabout. Couldn’t he have used a coach? It’s too bad he’s not around that we could observe his reaction to the thought.

Wouldn’t it be sensible, if you want to understand yourself, that you lead what Socrates called the “examined life?” If you want to appreciate the world, shouldn’t you see with your eyes what it has to offer? If you want to understand human foible, its greatness, indeed its nature, shouldn’t you pass some hours reading what Shakespeare or Jane Austen or Victor Hugo or Cervantes or Goethe or Dante or other time-tested writers and thinkers had to say? And isn’t life very much about not knowing what to do, not knowing what lies ahead? Isn’t it a constant battle among those things we can control and our reactions to those we can’t? Does the fog of war not apply equally to life?

What systematic short cuts does the life coach purport to offer, because experience says there aren’t any? I believe it was James Michener who said; “In an irrational world, the best you can hope for is to be prepared when chance comes your way. “

We have allowed in our midst those who seek to profit by proffering fluff. The life coach, the self-help books, the secrets, imply that one size fits all, that all are equally gifted and if you just follow a few simple steps that fortunately they know, you will “find” yourself. But as George Bernard Shaw understood, “It’s not about finding yourself, it’s about making yourself.” The time you spend listening to or reading the pablum offered by life coaches and self-helpers could be better spent participating enthusiastically, getting out and trying, falling and rising, no matter how many tumbles or how many times you have to give your head a shake.

I think laziness is the common factor among life coaches and those of similar ilk, who create a job and then hope to create a market. A life coach is one whose idea of housework is to walk on hardwood floors in socks. Wearing dark means the dust doesn’t show as much.

My advice, for which there is no fee because I believe in pricing things at their worth, is to trust your own counsel, learn from your errors, listen to those whose wisdom has been proven and doesn’t come with a bill, accept that you and they can be wrong, live without fear or shame of failure and take the other fork when someone says they have found the road to wealth and happiness.


Copyright © 2009 Paul Heno